Romantic Friday Writers: Confused

Romantic Friday Writers: Confused

 

http://fridaynightwriters.blogspot.com/ This blog has a challenge for writers of romance/love stories to write 400 words on a theme each Friday.  The theme this week is Confused.

So many opportunities for confusion and misunderstanding in love stories!  I selected a scene from my already-published novel (W)hole.  I would have kept going, if only the next part was the sexy scene that it seems like it’s leading to.  However, at this point the phone rings, and the scene goes in a very different direction! It has been really enlightening for me to be part of this group, as it’s making me realize that I don’t have enough romance in my romance stories!  I’ll have to start working on fixing that.

Word Count: 302 NCCO, since this is already published!

 

***

“Aren’t your friends curious to meet me?”

“Um, no, not really.”

Stewart took a picture of her guilty face.

“You haven’t told them,” he said.

She shook her head. She waited for him to say something, to complain, to get angry, but he said nothing. He put the camera back down and turned away from Elizabeth.
He got back on the wheelchair and turned to his room. Elizabeth picked up her camera and followed. In the room Stewart went to Robert’s computer and turned it toward his bed.
Elizabeth didn’t know what to say. A movie came on the computer and Stewart went to his bed. Elizabeth stood in the doorway, watching as he pushed himself to the edge of the wheelchair, grabbed the bed and yanked his body onto it. He didn’t look at her, just watched the movie.

Elizabeth held the camera up to her eye. Through the viewfinder she saw Stewart turn to look at her. He shook his head.

“Don’t,” he said.

She snapped a picture. She put the strap around her neck and walked closer to him. The look on his face was confused. He didn’t know what she was going to do next.
She lifted his shirt off his body and took a picture of his bare chest: wide and strong. She touched the long, white scars that ran horizontally around his body, and traced each one with the tip of her finger. Another picture, and Stewart tried to reach over to swat her. He was unbalanced and fell onto his side. Elizabeth came close again and focused on the black and white tattoo of a tiger’s head on Stewart’s bicep.

“What are you doing?” Stewart said.

“Making you mine.”

“Put the camera away and come here,” he said.

 

18 Comments

  1. Dear Ruth,
    Lovely intimate scene between these two! My guess is that they are going to kiss next! But you say that the phone rings. Darn!

    I am in a similar boat with you; I need also to make my romantic writing more romantic. You’re doing a good job with this text.

    Best wishes,
    Anna
    Anna’s RFW No 14 – “Confused”

  2. Francine Howarth
    Aug 12, 2011

    Hi,

    Ha ha, she’s got him right where she wants him: he’s hooked!

    Nice one.

    I didn’t have a very romantic piece this week and no time two write one on the fly, but romance in the air is hinted at. That’s my excuse! 😉

    best
    F

  3. Andy
    Aug 12, 2011

    Hello.
    I really like the vividness of this.
    Lovely ending.

    Nicely done, Ruth!

  4. Raquel Byrnes
    Aug 12, 2011

    Very nice tension between the two. I am liking the dynamic. My only quibble is the head hopping, but then again, it gives both perspectives so it works. Very intimate…great job.

  5. Li @FlashFiction
    Aug 12, 2011

    I like things being hinted at, so implied steaminess is OK by me 🙂 Nice detail about the tattoo. I haven’t read your stuff yet (I’m a new follower) but I gather that you introduce well-rounded characters who happen to have disabilities instead of making the disability the entire plot line. Which is great!

    • RuthMadison
      Aug 13, 2011

      Yes, I do try to! That’s the idea. There’s enough stories out there of the newly injured person learning to cope. I want to create stories of people who happen to have disabilities continuing on and living their lives! 🙂

  6. Mama Zen
    Aug 13, 2011

    This feels so human and real. Excellent.

  7. Laura
    Aug 13, 2011

    I loved the build up throughout this piece – there’s a real sense of electricity between the two of them – lovely read!
    Lx

  8. Marya
    Aug 13, 2011

    He may have *started* out confused, but he certainly wasn’t at the end! That “come here” was very decisive indeed! Great piece!

  9. J.L. Campbell
    Aug 14, 2011

    Interesting excerpt that shows that people with disabilities do have the same kind of male/female interaction as everybody else. Wonder what’s her motive to start snapping his pictures, ‘specially since he didn’t want her to.

    • RuthMadison
      Aug 14, 2011

      You’ll have to read to find out! 😛 lol

  10. Ms. Queenly
    Aug 14, 2011

    Oooo, nice. I might have to go pick up your book. I love your focus and dedication as I find myself rather intimidated by how my portrayals on something like devoteeism might be recieved.

    • RuthMadison
      Aug 15, 2011

      Thank you! That’s a great compliment. I spent ten years writing this book! And there’s still things I would change and do differently. It’s a never ending project, really.

  11. L'Aussie
    Aug 14, 2011

    Hi Ruth. I love how you deal with disabilities in your writing. This was a fresh touch, adding romance to the mix. The camera intrigues me too…

    Denise

  12. I’ve added a postscript to my post.
    Visiting is optional.
    Best wishes,
    Anna
    Anna’s RFW No 14 – “Confused”

    • RuthMadison
      Aug 17, 2011

      That is very interesting! I like hearing about your inspiration and thoughts. I think that crux of a story between is it better to go for a physically attractive guy or a guy you can talk to, is a great one to explore.

  13. Marsha A. Moore
    Aug 17, 2011

    I loved the twist, turning a moment fueled with uncertainty and mistrust into a tender, sexy moment. I like the acceptance each has for the other…wonderful chemistry.

    Sorry I’m so late in commenting. I had house guests until the end of the weekend and then exhaustion/illness set in…still not feeling well.

    • RuthMadison
      Aug 18, 2011

      Sorry to hear that you aren’t feeling well! I know how life can get in the way, though.

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