Disability and Devoteeism
They are linked. ¬†There will always be disability and there will always be devoteeism. ¬†The relationship between the two could be beautifully symbiotic. ¬†Right now, I think, most feel that it is parasidic and/or antagonistic.
People who have¬†disabilities¬†often attack devs¬†and¬†call them sick freaks and perverts. ¬†Devs with no outlet and no ability to talk about what they are in a safe environemnt, take images and videos without permission to use for their fantasy life. ¬†Having been mostly denied a real life.
To break this cycle I think we need to ask why are devotees¬†thought¬†of with such hatred or revulsion?
Is the idea that someone could find paralyzed limbs erotic and beautiful disgusting to you? ¬†What about the idea that someone could find long, tan legs erotic? Legs in lace stockings? What is it that makes disabled legs different?
Because paralysis is bad and broken and wrong.
Did that thought flit through your mind?
Allow yourself to imagine that maybe disability does not mean brokenness, helplessness, or wrongness. ¬†Once we can see disability as naturally as long hair or blue eyes, someone¬†finding¬†it attractive wouldn’t be scary.
Do you feel bad about being attracted to a man’s sandy hair? ¬†Why not? Because it’s not something¬†about¬†him that’s¬†worthy¬†of pity. It’s neutral.
If devotees had the oppportunity to talk with and interact with actual disabled people without fear of being reviled for their very existence, it would go a long way towards easing the complaints that some devs are socially awkward or highly inappropriate.
Before you criticize someone’s existence, think about how it feels when someone does that to you.
You’re disabled, the world would be so much better if you didn’t exist
You should die and leave the rest of us alone
I wish all people with disabilities would just go away
It stings, doesn’t it? ¬†Why is it wrong to say those things about people who have disabilities but it is okay to say it about devotees? ¬†Do you think we decided to be the way we are? We didn’t. ¬†We have every right to exist.
There are similarities between a disabled experience and a dev experience. ¬†Do these sound familiar to you?
-Other people loudly making statements about you and your worthiness.
-Words used to describe you that you don’t find flattering or accurate.
-Serious challenge finding people you can interact with authentically, let alone date.
-Having days when you (pointlessly) wish that you could be living a different life, that your “difference” would just go away, and other days when you feel competent, confident, and in control.
I have as much right to exist as you. I WILL NOT be erased.¬†Consider this the next time you feel yourself judging someone else: If you want acceptance, you must also give it to others. Don’t treat other people in ways you do not want to be treated.
Peace. Love. Tolerance. Acceptance. These are what Ruth Madison stands for.