Part 1

How Good It Can Be – Part 1

“Are you a devotee of paraplegics?” she asked him. Her bold, blunt question, and his reluctant, but affirmative reply changed everything between them.

At least since his early teens Danny¬†knew he had special feelings for girls in wheelchairs. He thought they and their paralyzed legs were beautiful, mysterious and endlessly sexy. He had no idea why he felt this way, or where this attraction came from. These feelings intensified into¬†manhood and he longed every day and every night¬†to find a woman with whom he was otherwise compatible, who happened to be a paraplegic. While the woman of his dreams eluded him,¬†Danny¬†dated able-bodied women, including a stunning blonde beauty named Michelle. They had met at work and were attracted to each other almost immediately. Friendship evolved quickly into romance and that led to sex….good sex…not great sex, because¬†Danny knew only¬†that elusive woman on wheels who lived in his¬†mind and heart¬†could ever¬†fully stoke his fires and make him the best he could be in bed. That said, Michelle was lovely, with her sparkling personality, pretty face, electric smile and the perfectly proportioned, well toned body of a cheerleader, which she had been through high school and college. Her breasts were firm, full and beautiful, but Danny had always been a “legman”, and Michelle’s legs were her best assets…long, sleek and flawless. It was heavenly when she clamped them around him as they made love, her hips thrusting in time with his.

What could have¬†been better than this? Only one thing, and Danny fantasized about it all the time when he was with Michelle, or any other woman for that matter. Even though it gave him occasional pangs of guilt, he would¬†imagine Michelle was completely paralyzed from the waist, or maybe even the chest down. His thoughts were not of being able to take advantage of her or being able to have his way with her. On the contrary,¬†his fantasies always involved helping her in any way he could and enjoying being needed in special ways. But there was no denying that¬†making Michelle¬†a spinal cord injured paraplegic in his mind was highly erotic. In fact, every time he created such scenarios they gave him great pleasure and¬†a sexual response that was off the charts! This was true whether the scenario involved being out on a dinner date with Michelle or being in bed with her. A common¬†denominator in all his fantasies was experiencing her paralysis in some way.¬†Sometimes it would involve watching her or helping her transfer into the car,¬†how she would need to use¬†her hands to maneuver her unresponsive lower body. Balance unsteady, legs flopping, feet dangling. Paraplegic transfers will¬†hit a devotee’s hot buttons every time! Of course, so, too will mental images of having sex. Whenever Danny wanted or needed a sexual release, all he had to do was think about making love to a paralyzed Michelle. Everything about it turned him on and lit him up! He thought of the contrast between her strong, active upper body and her lower body that would remain motionless no matter how passionate they became. He¬†imagined lovingly holding her¬†limp, lifeless, unfeeling legs in his hands,¬†spreading them and enjoying¬†how soft and flexible the paralysis had made them. He knew in his mind that¬†their foreplay would include him playing with her feet, which, whenever she lifted¬†a leg with her hand, would¬†dangle freely¬†and enticingly, her toes pointing straight down.

Danny imagined Michelle egging him on toward orgasm by talking to him about her paralysis,¬†how strange it was not being able to move or feel half her body, how her once well toned¬†calves and thighs were now flaccid and melting away,¬†and how helpless she was out of her wheelchair. And he dreamed of her pushing his biggest hot button of all as they made love, asking him to tell her when he was inside her because she couldn’t feel it, ¬†and to describe for her what it was like and everything he was doing. He fantasized that Michelle would want to do that as a way of trying to¬†compensate for being totally disconnected from that part of her body.¬†In the afterglow of such fantasies, Danny would often wonder how close his fantasies were to reality, and he would also nurse varying degrees of guilt over his devoteeism that compelled him to envision a perfectly healthy and able-bodied woman like Michelle as a wheelchair dependent paraplegic.

There just seemed to be something wrong about it all, but he found himself both unable and unwilling¬†to rid himself of these feelings and desires. Simply put, Danny had¬†a sexual fetish. He had no clue where it came from, but it was part of him and definitely had its hooks sunk deep into his heart, mind and soul. He knew that coming out of the closet about this would lead to nothing but universal rejection and condemnation. But at the same time, he believed there had to be¬†some paraplegic women¬†out there¬†who believed what he believed – that a para and a dev could actually be a perfect match for each other! Instead of her paralysis being an impediment to a serious relationship, as it would be with most men, it¬†would be an advantage and a sexual¬†catalyst when she was with a¬†devotee. All the usual negatives about her disability would become positives¬†in the presence of a devotee – her wheelchair, her¬†paralyzed legs and on and on. You name it, he’d love it and he’d love¬†her¬†with a passion and devotion only a devotee could provide.¬†There had to be paras who would get it about the good¬†devotees like him, but so far Danny had had no luck finding any, and was left to dwell in¬†his fantasy world.

Then came that awful day in the midst of the economic crisis when the company they worked for announced major layoffs. Danny survived it, but Michelle was let go. Desperate for work she found a job out of state, and suddenly she was gone. They kept in contact for awhile, but over time they each developed their own new love interests and drifted out of touch.

Fast forward¬†three years and Michelle was back in town and hired once again by Danny’s employer as the company moved into an expansion mode. She popped Danny an e-mail giving him the news and they got on the phone to talk about her return. At the end of the conversation, Michelle mentioned there had been a major change in her life but that she wanted to share that with Danny when they got together again. She sounded so mysterious and he wondered what it could be.

Since they knew each other so well, Michelle offered to cook him dinner at her new place and he eagerly accepted. When he rang the bell, a familiar voice from inside said “Come on in, Danny, it’s open!”

As he pulled on the door handle and entered the apartment, there she was, and the “major change” was revealed. To Danny’s complete shock, Michelle was in a wheelchair! As she rolled up to him, in a short, sleeveless yellow sun dress, ¬†he leaned down and they shared a¬†warm hug and a kiss on the cheek. “My goodness, Michelle, you look great, but what in the world happened to you?” Danny asked. Michelle backed up her chair a bit and replied, “I broke my back¬†in a bad car wreck about a year after I left here and I’m totally paralyzed from the waist down. My spinal cord was severed at what they call the T-10 level. It’s a complete injury”. Danny pretended not to fully understand what that meant, but as a devotee, he knew exactly what she was saying and what it meant. Michelle would never walk again, and couldn’t move or feel anything below her injury.

Her stunning revelation left Danny a jumble of conflicting emotions. Outwardly he expressed his genuine concern and sorrow to Michelle, which she seemed to appreciate. But inside his chest, Danny’s devotee heart was racing as Michelle described her situation, and he found himself overwhelmed with how beautiful and, yes, sexy she looked sitting before him¬†in her wheelchair. “May I sit down?” Danny asked.¬† He needed to sit down, because he was very quickly¬†becoming fully aroused and had no control at all over the physical reaction he was having. Sitting was the best way to conceal it from Michelle and avoid complete embarrassment.

“Why didn’t you tell me about this on the phone?” Danny asked.

“Well, I thought about telling you,” said Michelle, “but just couldn’t. Maybe I was afraid you wouldn’t want to see me if you knew I had become a paraplegic. Since this happened, I’ve found most guys who would have been all over me before the accident, don’t show much¬†interest now that I’m a chick in a chair.” She smiled as she said that, but he could sense her sadness and resignation. In her mind she was damaged goods with little, if any prospect of having a meaningful relationship with a quality guy.

As for Danny, he was totally in the closet as a devotee. His special attraction for paraplegic women was his deepest, darkest secret and he couldn’t imagine sharing it with anyone. But as he enjoyed the delicious¬†dinner Michelle had prepared, and reveled in how they were so comfortable talking¬†with each other, as they had always been, he silently wished there could be a way to share his secret with her. As he watched Michelle zip around the kitchen, maneuvering her chair so gracefully, he was totally taken by how spectacular she looked to him. In his eyes, two years as a paraplegic had done marvelous things to Michelle’s¬†body. Her upper arms were half again as big as he had remembered, the muscles in her arms and shoulders¬†well defined now, making her look so fit and athletic. As for her once “perfect” legs, it was as though they had melted away after two years of total paralysis. Her calves looked like they belonged to a gangly 10 year old girl, and her short sun dress revealed thighs that had seemingly lost nearly all their muscle tone. They flattened out as she sat in her wheelchair, and jiggled ever so slightly whenever her big wheels encountered any irregular surface.¬†Her legs¬†looked so soft and sexy to him. As for her feet, they looked lovely in the white sandals Michelle was wearing. All Danny could think was, “Michelle is more beautiful than ever. NOW, she is perfect. But how do I tell her that? How do I explain the devotee part of me without it turning her off and ending our relationship?”

Michelle found herself really smitten with Danny…more than she had expected to be. The old feelings were starting to flood her heart and soul, but she was having her own quiet anxiety attack, fearing that her paralysis would turn Danny off, as it seemed to do with most guys. That fear crescendoed after dinner when Danny plopped down on the couch and invited her to join him. Uh oh, thought Michelle…a transfer. Then he’ll see how disabled I truly am. Little did she know that Danny couldn’t wait to see her transfer and that turning him¬†OFF was last thing she needed to be worried about. Michelle really couldn’t refuse to join Danny on the couch, so she took a deep breath, angled her chair just right, locked her brakes, lifted her legs one at a time with her hands to get her feet off the foot rest. Pushing down with¬†a fist down on the couch cushion nearest Danny, and using her other hand to push up from one of her big wheels, she managed to make a safe landing on the first try. Her lifeless legs wobbled and spread open momentarily and one of her ankles turned over, but she quickly placed her hands on her knees and made the necessary adjustments. “Well done, my dear!”, exclaimed Danny as he smiled into her eyes and put an arm around her shoulders.¬†How typical of Danny, thought Michelle. He¬†had always been such a gentleman who found the right thing to say to make anyone he was with feel comfortable. But, she pondered, what was he¬†really¬†thinking?

They talked for quite awhile, catching up and filling in the blanks from all the time they had been apart. Finally, Michelle looked down and saw that her ankles and feet had swollen which often happened at the end of the day when she had been sitting for hours on end. “Danny…I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to put my feet up. Do you mind?”¬† “Mind?”, said Danny. “Of course not. Tell you what…let me scooch down to the end here and you can lay your legs and feet across my lap, just like the old days!”. Now Michelle was really nervous, remembering how much Danny used to love her legs…how he couldn’t stop caressing, feeling and fondling them in situations like this. How would he react now that her legs looked so different, and were so thin and obviously paralyzed? She had absolutely no idea how this was going to work out…but did as Danny had asked…and then laid back, propped up by a couple of pillows.

Unbeknownst to Michelle, Danny had just about had a meltdown watching her transfer. And, as he took one of her feet in his hands…holding it as gently and carefully as if it were a baby bird, his heart was pounding and he had a hard on so big¬†it hurt. Until this very moment, Danny had had to settle for his fantasies of being with a paraplegic woman, but now it was actually happening, and best of all, he was with Michelle, someone he absolutely adored. Outwardly Danny played it cool, but his thoughts ran to how much softer her feet were now than they used to be, and how much softer than he had imagined a paras feet would be. He slid one hand slowly up her slender calf and gave her a love tap on the knee. Classic Danny, thought Michelle, recalling how¬†she had seen him do that countless times before, but thinking also how strange it was now, because she couldn’t feel his touch…couldn’t feel a thing he was doing.

“You know, your legs are still beautiful, Michelle, and your¬†feet are soooo soft and sexy,” said Danny, smiling his approval.

That comment just blew Michelle away and she responded, saying, “You must be putting me on. How could they be sexy to you when I can’t move or feel your touches, and when they’ve atrophied down to half their original size?”

“I don’t know…they just are, babe,” replied Danny. How she loved hearing Danny call her “babe” again, just as he used to. She also loved watching Danny get a devilish grin on his face as he slid his hands up her slender calves and over her knees to the¬†hem of her sun dress, now hiked halfway up her thighs. Her worry evaporated away to wonder as she found herself getting turned on watching Danny enjoying her legs in a way no man had since her accident. And it was such a revelation for her to realize that as long as she could watch Danny touching her she could get pleasure from it even though she couldn’t feel it. For the moment, Danny was relieved that¬†Michelle had no feeling in her lower body, because otherwise she surely would have felt his erection pressing up against the back of her knees, and wanted an explanation of what had him so aroused. Danny always loved Michelle’s legs, but he never before had sprung an erection like this just from playing with them. Danny lifted up Michelle’s closest leg and kissed her kneecap. It amazed him how totally limp her leg was… how it was just dead weight in his hands….how her once firm muscles seemed to have been replaced by soft tissue that gave way to his touch and enabled his finger tips to press all the down to her bones with very little effort.¬†Danny had long fantasized about how a paraplegic’s legs would feel, but he never imagined they would feel this good and excite him so much!¬†¬†He also quickly¬†realized he could move¬†Michelle’s paralyzed legs around any way he chose to, and that she had neither the ability¬†to assist or resist. Danny wasn’t sure why, but¬†he found¬†such erotic energy in her paralysis and her resultant helplessness. He felt as though he were on the verge of losing control, of cumming spontaneously in his pants.

Michelle was beginning to take note of Danny’s growing desire, and she was getting passionate right along with him. He leaned toward her as she pushed herself up to a sitting position and they shared a long hug, groping each other and sharing an endless round of deep¬†french kisses that made them both feel as though they’d gone back in time to the way it used to be between them. Michelle decided to take a chance and took Danny’s hands in hers and placed them on her breasts as they kissed some more. She helped him undo the buttons on the front of her sun dress, and she unfastened and removed her bra, freeing her firm, full breasts to bob and jiggle tantalizingly before her eyes. In a heartbeat, a breathless Danny was all over them, feeling Michelle up, and suckling her nipples like a baby as she moaned and sighed softly. Michelle was in heaven, her upper body writhing, ¬†but her ecstasy was tainted by the harsh reality of how much¬†she missed the old tingle between her legs. That was gone forever, never to return.¬†As she and Danny kissed and played some more, she¬†wondered if her paralyzed pussy was getting wet , but she had no way of knowing because she couldn’t feel it. She couldn’t feel anything¬†from her belly button down and unless she had visual contact, it was as though her lower half didn’t exist.

It wasn’t long before the two former lovers found themselves lying next to each other on the couch as their passion grew. But, while Danny paid attention to all of her, it soon became obvious to her that he was totally obsessed with her legs and feet. He couldn’t stop touching them, playing with them and, for lack of a better term, making love to them with his now trembling hands. How extraordinary this was. She could scarcely take it all in. Danny, her old¬†legman, in love with her now¬†paralyzed, atrophied legs…feeling passion for legs that had no feeling…the legs she cried over…the legs she considered useless,¬†unattractive and dead. There was something strange and¬†strangely wonderful going on here and Michelle couldn’t quite get a handle on it.

Then she remembered another paraplegic woman in rehab talking to her about devotees…guys who were attracted to girls in wheelchairs, and super turned on by all aspects of their paralysis. She warned Michelle that some of the “devs”, as she called them, were weirdos, sick perverts to be avoided at all costs, but that some were terrific guys, and normal in every way, except for this quirk in their sexuality that made paraplegic women more attractive to them than any able-bodied women could ever be. She recalled her friend¬†telling her¬†she should¬†keep an open mind¬†to having a relationship with one of the “good” devs, as she called them, and that she needed to accept the fact that most other guys¬†wouldn’t find her sexy and desirable now that she was in a wheelchair. Michelle was intrigued by the notion that there could actually¬†be¬†a guy¬†out there who might love her, not in spite of her disability, but, at least in part, because of it. She would have daydreams and night dreams about meeting one of those good devotees who wouldn’t be embarrassed to be seen with a woman in a wheelchair, but¬†who would be¬†proud of her, admire her, and truly believe her paralysis made her more interesting, and more lovely and more desirable than she ever could have been when she could walk. How good it could be with a guy like that, she had¬†thought. But,¬†after a time she¬†dismissed the idea of ever finding someone like that. And¬†because she so¬†hated being a paraplegic,¬†because of how¬†it complicated her life¬†and was changing her body in ways she didn’t like, Michelle came to¬†doubt that the good devotees her friend had described even existed. She became convinced it¬†must be¬†a fantasy, that no man could want her like she was now, much less want her for a life time. She would live the rest of her life alone and unloved, and that’s just the way it was going to be.

But now, as her reunion with Danny¬†continued to exceed her wildest expectations and those memories flashed through her mind, Michelle realized she’d totally lost track of what Danny was doing. She looked down and saw him kissing one of her thighs passionately and caressing her soft, lifeless flesh with both hands as though he were on the couch with a super model, not a cripple. She also took note of the huge bulge in Danny’s pants and the puzzle pieces started fitting together.¬†“Oh my God!” she thought, as it suddenly hit her that Danny, her precious Danny might be a devotee!

Michelle had a reputation for saying whatever was on her mind, and wasn’t about to deviate from that now.

She gently tapped Danny on the shoulder and said lovingly, “May I ask you something?”

“Why, sure, babe…ask me anything at all,” came the reply.

“Okay”, she continued, “but please don’t be mad at me. Danny, I love how this evening is going. It’s turned out better than I could ever have dreamed, and I am overwhelmed at how much you seem to love me and want me just the way I am.”

“Well,” Danny interrupted, “What’s not to love? You’re beautiful and sexy just like you’ve always been, and maybe even more so now!”

“Oh Danny,” said Michelle earnestly, “That is thrilling to hear, and something no man has come close to saying to me since I¬†became a paraplegic. But the fact is I’ll be in a wheelchair for the rest of my life. I’m paralyzed from the waist down..no movement..no feeling..and it’s never going to change.”

Danny listened intently and tried to reassure Michelle, saying, “Darling…I’ll be honest, while I feel bad about what happened to you….from my standpoint, I wouldn’t change a thing!”

Michelle flashed a wide smile, gave Danny a kiss, took a deep breath, and decided to go for broke. As they snuggled in each other’s arms and Danny reached down to grab one of Michelle’s limp legs and draw it up and drape it over his hips, Michelle looked him in the eyes and said softly and slowly, “Danny, are you a devotee of paraplegics?”

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